This blog

This is my journey. My journey of changing my lifestyle to that of a healthier one. This is the journey of a young single mother setting out to lose weight and also to become the best version of herself possible. This is one person doing things the right way. Losing weight and becoming healthy with no gimmicks, no weight watchers, atkins, crash diets, crazy pills or wraps, not even a gym membership. This is not about temporary fixes, but about a lifestyle repair. This could be the story of your next door neighbor, the girl at the park in the mom jeans, the woman you just judged walking with two little boys in each hand, I'm your average everyday Jane, and this is my journey. Becoming a new me. The right way.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Your fitness journey and how others play into it

Let me just first say it is awesome to have people close to you trying to lose weight or supporting you. It can be a great source of encouragement! And here's some good ideas for having a fitness buddy, and also, some things to watch out for.

Compete

You could do something similar to the biggest loser. Put money down, maybe whoever loses the most percentage of their weight in a month (because simply pounds is unfair as heavier people lose quicker. Unless you are starting at the same weight you should look at percentage rather than just pounds) gets a prize. Like, say the loser takes winner to a movie or (healthy) dinner. Maybe you just bet cash who knows.

Can you say work out buddy!

Working out with a partner can be a pretty great thing. Not only can you have your partner help you with stretches and be your spotter, but also if you're trying something new or silly looking it can be pretty entertaining to see what someone else looks like doing it. Working out with someone you're close to can be hilarious and maybe even a little awkward. Of course, having a partner can be pretty helpful in more productive ways too. Maybe you didn't realize you have been doing a particular workout incorrectly (if not done correctly you'll still burn calories of course, but probably not target the specific area quite as well as planned.) and they can see it by watching you. You can show each other new moves, record each other for future play back or maybe you just want pictures and video for on your own fitness blog. Best of all, having someone else there goes back up to the competitive nature in you as well. No one wants to be the 'more' out of shape friends. So if the two of you are doing the same work out both will stay with it longer hoping the other will stop first. It makes for a stronger workout. If you're two girls working out why is getting your nails any different than a work out session? It's gossip time! Keeping your mind off the fact that you're working out and exhausted might keep you going longer too!

Support

This is huge. This is actually part of the reason I have this blog. Having so many people rooting for you, asking you how you're doing, being interested in your progress, not only does it motivate you, but it also keeps you accountable. I would urge everyone who is trying to lose weight to let the whole world know! You will get some who blow you off, doubt you, thinking it's just a phase, and set out to prove those people wrong! But the people who support you might even adapt your habits, or at least respect you enough to not make a quit pit stop through McDonald's drive ins while you're with them. Having friends with similar lifestyles makes them easier to maintain and feel more, let's say...typical.

Compatibility

Okay, now I feel like I'm just listing things a good spouse should have...but I'm really not. I couldn't think of a better word, so this is it. If you're anything like me, when you really get into something that's probably all you want to talk about. Like, when you meet someone new you're calling your girlfriends up the very next day to discuss the boy. Well, why is adapting a healthy lifestyle any different? I haven't come across that many people who care that there are around 77 calories in an egg, or that you burn more calories jump roping than you do jogging. No, very feel people share my passion for measuring my mayo before I use it and are so tickled with my food scale. Having someone who can get excited about all of these things with you, rather than for  you (as the supportive friends do) then you're in for a world of happiness and late night talks about the consistency of your poop this week. Yeah, we went there.

Knowledge

This is a pretty big one too. I have a friend who decided back around the holidays last year that she was done being unhealthy. I had dieted off and on around the same time, she stuck with it, I didn't. Now that I am passionate about it I've committed to learning a lot about not only the foods I'm eating but also the way different exercises affect my body and such. Now, for every one tip I can give her, she usually has three to hand back to me. We show each other new work outs all the time, things that we found are super hard which we love! And I have been blessed enough to be able to give some of my other friends who haven't carved a billion snips of random fitness knowledge into their heads some good advice too. I know all too many who think the quickest and easiest way to lose weight is to hardly eat at all. I've been able to help them learn all the reasons this isn't healthy, the way it damages their body and actually hurts their weight loss goals, and to help them to get on track. Just as I have been helped.



Now those are some of the super great reasons why it's great to have friends with you on your fitness journey. But there's a few snags too.

Competition.

Wait, didn't we just talk about this? As a good thing? Yes. Definitely. But there will be weeks when you will lose say two pounds and your friend will lose four. There will be times you're still teetering in the 170s and they finally bumped down to the high 160s. There are time you're going to compare your journey to theirs and wonder why you aren't having the same success.

Don't. While you're watching them thinking they have lost a few pounds more than you, they are probably watching you thinking how you have smaller thighs than they do or your obliques are practically gone. Don't compare yourself to someone else at all times because then you're not seeing the results you've made for yourself! Your main focus on your fitness journey should be about you! Of course you want to support your friends and see them do well to but odds are you are probably different heights, are starting at different weights, will lose different amounts, and have different life styles and final weights. Don't take your body for granted just because theirs might be in better shape for now. We know you're out of shape, that's the whole reason we're doing this!

I actually have a personal story here. As mentioned before I have had two children, boys. I have a friend who had one child, a little girl. When I left for the beach she thought she weighted around maybe 178-180, I weighed 184.4. Just last week the two of us along with another friend (as mentioned above who started losing around the holidays) and she weighed 162. Now I have been working my toosh off and was the heaviest one in the room. So I was all about self pity and wallowing for a few days, ignoring the fact that I'd already lost about 11 pounds. When I found out later that she wasn't actually losing weight with eating healthy and working out (though she said she'd been running) that she'd had a little...let's say, help. I was annoyed. Annoyed because she was 'cheating' and made me feel bad even though I was doing it right damn it!
Of course I realize now how silly that is. She knows my views on all of the alternative weight loss supplements and gimmicks(pills, wraps, etc), she knows that as soon as you stop the gimmicks you gain the weight back, but for whatever reason she still chose them. And that's fine. She can be proud of the fact that she's lost 16 pounds in the last month doing her things, and I can be proud that I've lost 14 doing my things. And we can both be happy for that. There was a time that I was so miserable with my body and myself that I was two clicks and one credit card swipe away from buying every 'weight loss miracle' out there. But I didn't. The moral of the story is that I got too carried away worrying about her and not me that I even got angry at her! How silly is that? We all want the same things, to be happy with our bodies, I just want to be healthy in mine as well. We are all young though, I think few our age really worry about our bodies to that extent.

Support

This isn't such a huge deal either. I just wanted to throw it out there that sometimes when you have a lot of people rooting for you that you may get over whelmed with the pressure of not wanting to let all these people down. Or maybe you just feel embarrassed when you gain or don't lose. Either way. I'll say again. This is your journey, about you.


Everyone else is great but they're just that...everyone else. Get as much out of them as you possibly can, but don't let them drag you down.

Happy fitness folks.


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